Christmas Eve Night

 

 

On Christmas Eve night, we were invited to Wayne's former in-law's family gathering.  Yes, it sounds funny but he has been a part of their family for a very long time and since the divorce, they have insisted that he be part of the family still.  Debi, his ex-wife, divorced the family the first year that we spent time with them.  This year, Aunt Phyllis asked that Wayne be Santa.  At first, we hesitated because we didn't want to infringe on Scott's time with the family.  Last year, Scott was ill and didn't make it.  It was the year that we were there and also Leslea.  I couldn't help but think it was because we were there that he didn't come.

The past year, Scott and Phyllis have been talking and this year she told him that we would be there.  She reassured us that he was good about it and even looking forward to it.  So, with that we traveled to Scappose with hope in our heart but trying not to get too excited in case of a letdown.  On Christmas Eve when Alison was here, our lawyer called and told us that Debi was finally served papers the Wednesday before.  Wayne is taking her to court to adjust the spousal support--it has been ten years and with him unemployed, we need the money.  We started this process the first part of November and Debi has refused to come to the door when the servers come with the papers.  So unfortunately she gets this the week before Christmas but that is her own fault, she knew this was going to happen.

Our fear was that she would show up at the family gathering. Aunt Phyllis told me that Debi would be asked to leave and that she would not allow her to do any more pain to the family.  I guess she hurt them all pretty deeply with a scathing email when she "divorced" them.

Well, she didn't show up.  Thank You, LORD!  We had an awesome time meeting Scott's girlfriend, Katie, and with the rest of the family.  Wayne was the Santa and was so happy to be with Scott.  It has been a long time since I saw him so happy (Leslea's wedding was last time).  We had a "White Elephant" gift exchange.  Scott received "Stompez slippers" (just like Grace's) and tried to pawn them on everyone.  He ended up wearing them all over.  Kit, Aunt Phyllis' hubby, wore one and Scott wore the other for awhile--it was obvious that the alcohol was flowing freely.

 

We brought gifts for Scott and Katie that "Santa" gave them.  I got a nice candle centerpiece for Katie. The past years when I hoped and prayed that Scott would show up on Christmas, I bought a Hallmark motorcycle ornament every year.  So, this night, I wrapped them up and had "Santa" give it to him.  Wayne and I were outside when Scott finally opened his gift.  He came outside with a big grin and hugged his Dad.  "Wow, how did you do that?" he asked.  "The ornaments are awesome, there is one of the bike I have now!"  That year was 2006.  This obviously was a "God thing" because I almost didn't bring them but throughout the morning, I was reminded over and over about them.  I told Scott about me buying them every year for him.  No, I didn't get a hug.  I understand that it is far too soon.  I want it to be genuine.  Right now, he is still influenced by his mom.  I have time, I will wait.  The most important relationship is Wayne and him now.

 

When we left, Wayne and Scott hugged.  I deliberately was carrying a big box just so Scott didn't feel that he had to hug me.  It worked.

Thank You, Oh LORD for a Christmas to remember and I pray that it is a beginning step in the healing process and that 2013 brings Scott and Wayne closer together.